The day was hot as always. The thunder striking in the background as people passed by without a care. Flashes of light here and there shone brightly and blinded if you looked directly at it. Above the clouds swirled and danced in the constant storm, making it seem oh so depressing. Swaying and wavering with each passing wind. It wasn't a breeze, it was a full-blown wind and it was heavy, nearly knocking children on their asses. Hah key word for the day. Amy was looking for an ass, just not that particular kind. No, instead she was looking for an ass with long ears, a snout and a skinny tail. It would have four legs and hooves and made the most obnoxious noise since nails on the chalk board. Amy stopped walking. The THOUGHT of that memory was awful. The screeching so annoying it nearly sent chills of disgust and fear down the woman's back. As well it seemed you could always feel your nails grinding away which made it so much worse. The feel of the slate beneath your fingernails just chilling in the most god-awful way. How did she come to this topic? She'd lost her train of thought. Oh.. right.. the ass. Yep Amy was looking for the ass alright. But not just any old ass. No siree, this one could talk. Or so the mission had discreetly implied. A talking mule. What a pain in the ass. Ha! There was that word ass again. Amy found it oh so amusing. Ass and ass two words meaning two separate things. An ass's ass oh that was an amusing thought, but enough word mannerisms.
Amy realized she had stopped moving and looked around. Where was she? Well judging from the broken down fence and the chicken coop, she assumed a farm. The chickens were screaming at each other, flapping their wings and let's face it, pecking at each other's heads. Their golden peaks leaving marks of red. Dumb animals. Okay maybe it was mean, but seriously. chickens were incredibly stupid. She seemed to decide this completely when one ran head first into the wooden fence post, essentially knocking itself out. Such a stupid white bird.. maybe Amy would fry it up later.. The thought amused her and she licked her lips. Mm.. fried chicken. Quickly she caught a grip on herself. No.. killing the contractor's chickens...might not be such a good idea. She sighed sadly. Too bad.. Amy liked fried chicken and she was hungry even if a bit, but as she came closer to the barn she found herself quickly losing that appetite.
Approaching the farmyard she could smell manure. Honestly that killed all notions she had on eating anything. The scent was sickening and made her cringe ad the way her boots got stuck in the muddy ground didn't help. The thought of walking through animal shit was honestly not very appealing. Amy shuddered and let out an annoyed sigh as she yanked her feet with great force and with each step more momentum was placed. Oh yes, that didn't help it only threw her deeper in mud with each step. It enraged the girl and she showed it, her eyes flicking to the eyes of the squeaking rabbits. What the hell are YOU looking at? I'll make fur coats out of you! She threatened the rabbits in their minds. Naturally they just jumped and scampered about in their large cage box. Such timid creatures turned off by Amy's awesome abilities. They didn't understand her, but they had heard a sudden loud noise.
Closer still she came as the boy in question came into sight. His petite body barely four feet and his hair a mess and tangle of red auburn strands. His eyes a golden color and full of panic. On his small under shape body was a pair of overalls and flannel of a plaid shirt buttoned to the top. Hey not a good choice, but hell! Who cared when you worked in a shit yard all day? His body was flung and covered with mud and possibly with blood and sweat. His face a dark color but Amy assumed this too was from sweat and dirt mingling and making mud on the boy's body. He looked nasty to touch. Amy wondered for a moment if that made her racist, but shrugged it off. The boy was in a frenzy as he scampered up to Amy with amazing speed. Then again he didn't have damn combat boots to move through the literal shit with. Oh when Amy got home, oh how she would wallow in the ability to scour herself in the shower. The place smellt of crap and sweaty feet. Two things Amy wasn't too fond on smelling.
Her eyes turned to the boy and she stumbled as she nearly knocked her over when he embraced her. His tiny arms looped around her body like she was the only thing keeping him alive. Soft sobs fell from his tiny mouth. He wrapped his tiny fists in the contours of her skirt and sniffled. His eyes clenched shut as he shakily spoke. "I'm so dead.. So DEAD! Unless you help me. Please help! My dad is gonna kill me!" He shook and moved to grab his hair. Amy was unsure how to respond. Recoiling back, she blinked slowly and pushed the boy off of her or attempted to. The little weirdo had a tight grip. She was silent and her hair fell in her face, the closeness making her extremely uncomfortable with the heat. She felt sticky and uncomfortable and this little man wasn't helping one bit. His body heat on her somewhat covered legs was making her sweat more and she didn't want to contribute to the already nasty smelling atmosphere.
"Calm down, he's not going to kill you." She responded in her soft and as usual, calm voice. Hesitantly her hand moved and she began to pat the small boy on the head. She had a soft spot for children, yes. However she did not exactly like being touched. This included children There was only one man she allowed to touch her and this small boy was neither him nor a man. So greatly he was neither of them. He was just a small boy scared of breaking his daddy's ass. Oh how very fail. Amy simply couldn't voice this to him though. It was sad. The fact she was afraid of hurting a small boy's feelings. However Amy refused to be a bully. Her heart wouldn't let her, at least whatever was left of her heart. After all she'd gone through there was no surprise that she was a tad bit bitter and otherwise isolated from people in general.
The boy shook his head and stomped backwards. "Hell no! You don't understand! That's his prized mule! He has it purebred and everything. He has a special room for it and everything! That donkey is more important than life itself!" He sobbed again and pulled at his hair. A panic looked exaggerating more. "Oh dear god I don't want to die... I can't diee... I'm so young!" He sniffed and began flailing like a micro-sized idiot.
Amy sighed and felt her brow twitch as she closed her lids and simply listened to his tiny fear tantrum. Her patience wore thin and she lifted a hand. Quickly she felled her fist on the boy's head. He yelped and looked at her all teary. Amy snorted and rolled her eyes. "Being a spazz won't help you. Now where's this ass? I'll examine it." Amy explained as she knelt down and began picking sticks out of her combat boots. How annoying this was. Why did she always get the ridiculous missions? The ones with the crazy people? The last one included a man who was like a shark in personality and now she had to cure a dumbass's smart ass. Oh the irony! Simplistic irony and play on words. Amy was having such a wondrous glorious day. Well not really, so sarcasm was a good thing too. Amy had low hopes on the way this mission would go. The donkey would be a pain, she could just tell. She could almost hear that annoying sort of baying that donkeys did. The most obnoxious sound in the world that would make Amy want to kill it on the spot. At that moment Amy began to wonder... did she have rage issues?
Before she could get her answer, Amy found the boy retreating. She braced herself mentally. She'd have to hold in her hatred for donkeys today. Well not the donkey itself, but the sounds it made. Animals were weird and Amy, well Amy had the soul of a tiger. It made her vicious, angry and prone to having a temper. She'd jump at opportunities mentally, yet she had control on her mind waves. So instead of reacting as she'd want, she would hold herself back as if mentally chained to an invisible wall. Her eyes closed and she took a deep breath. When she opened them she saw the same small boy tugging gently yet stubbornly as a rope that was laced on his arms. His body pulling out a donkey from the barn. It sounded more amazing than it looked. After all pulling a rabbit out of his ass would have been a more entertaining show. Amy watched through narrowed eyes as the boy led the four-legged ass closer and closer, its ears flopping and twitching and its large teeth almost mocking her. It was stopped in front of her and seemed to cock its head to the side. Its eyes glimmering with a cutesy look that made Amy wonder what the hell it wanted. Maybe taking this mission was a bad idea. After all, she did dislike this thing more and more she looked at it.
"So what's wrong with it? It seems like an average ass." She said in as calm a voice as she could muster. Naturally it wasn't as calm as it could have been. She really seemed to hold a strong dislike for the mule. Her green eyes piercing as she examined it. It looked normal. How had the boy gotten it to talk? He said it didn't shut up. Here it was being all nice and calm. Such a good mule. However Amy didn't trust so called talking animals. Anything that spoke could weave lies and cause mayhem. Simply saying the word BOMB could throw people into a chaotic frenzy. This was one of the cases you could tell. That cutesy look wouldn't fool a hardened woman like Amy. She straightened herself and placed her skinny arms on her hips. "Well you stupid thing! You can talk can't you?!" A risky move, but it would resolve in the end if it worked. She sort of hoped it wouldn't begin donkey talk. After all that would just piss her off and then she'd kill it. That would be bad... very bad.. Dead donkey meant broke Amy. She didn't want that to happen, so she simply stood in the moment awaiting for the damn thing to respond. It seemed to grin at her words then snorted and opened its lips, showing off that gross gray tongue with half eaten oats.
"Stupid well no siree! I'm nowhere near that! You see I'm a mule. There's nothing stupid about me. I spend my days working on the fields and talking to my friends the farm animals. They are good buddies of mine you know. My name is Esther, yes I know Esther is a girl's name, but I like the name Esther. Wasn't she a queen in the bible? I do believe so. Lots of cool names in the bible. Say what's your name? This boy was so nice to bring friends. I enjoy your company. Say can you tell me-"
It talked and talked... Now Amy did understand the extent of this mission. Each word gave her more and more fury to pulse through her veins. She snorted and sighed exasperatedly. She could do this.. she could make it. Tick tock, the clock in Amy's head was the only thing soothing her. She wondered I what the boy had done to make such a horrid thing as a donkey that never shut. the. hell. up. It was a demon! It had to be. Nothing was more nightmareish than this damn donkey. It didn't get the hint either. Amy's fists clenched. She was trying to think of a plan, but naturally that wasn't working with the constant yammering of the donkey in her ears. She was close to... ohp there went the last straw. With a shout of something along the lines of "SHUT THE HELL UP!" Amy punched the Donkey in it's fucking throat. Or so she said fucking donkey in her head as she did so. A soft sort of cree sounding in the air as the mule went flying into the barn wall. It yelped and then bayed. Amy clenched her body and breathed evenly. Okay so she lost her temper. That happened sometimes, didn't it?
"MY ASS!" The boy shouted as he skid over to the fallen animal. He sobbed and sobbed and Amy didn't care at this point. Though she did believe she may have gone a little overboard. The donkey was living and breathing though, so that was good, right? She'd get her pay still or at least she'd better. She'd be pissed if she didn't and then the donkey wouldn't be the only one injured. The boy shot a look at Amy that was venomous and Amy returned it.
"Hey I fixed him didn't I? Get the hell off my back!" She snorted and turned, storming off. Ungratefully cur! How could he not say thank you? So stupid Why'd Amy even try? After all that hard work! Well okay so it wasn't really hard work, but HELL it was a pain. She didn't exactly go around doing stuff of people often. As well it was even less with animals she wasn't someone's Doctor DoLittle. Animals were stupid yet intelligent creatures; far too gullible at the hands of humans who used them often. Amy wanted no part in watching owned creatures talk nonsense about shit she didn't care about. With a heavy sigh she slowed her anger and walked to the mission board to receive her pay. Afterwards she would go home and scrub herself down. She had no interest in being surrounded by cocks and asses.
[exit]
Sat Jul 23, 2011 1:51 pm by 
